When Logic Can’t Save You

How Good Will Hunting taught me the importance of emotional intelligence and facing yourself

If you’ve watched the movie Good Will Hunting, there’s a good chance it impacted you in a unique way based on the specific circumstances you're going through in life.

If you haven’t watched it, this is your sign to do so. But don’t worry, that won’t affect your reading of this blog.

The film has multiple scenes that fill you with emotion. But I’ll focus on one scene in particular. I was lucky to have seen this movie at a very early age.

Robin Williams plays Sean Maguire, a compassionate therapist who helps Will confront his buried trauma. Matt Damon plays Will Hunting, a mathematical genius with a troubled past who hides his pain behind intellect.

Will was a janitor at MIT, not a student, but he was naturally smarter than all the students and teachers there even at the feeble age of 21. One day, he happens to solve an extremely difficult problem that Professor Gerald Lambeau had written on the board outside his class, hoping a student might crack it and become eligible for a prestigious award. Will stumbles upon the problem while sweeping the floor and solves it effortlessly.

Lambeau is baffled. None of his students could solve the problem, and he has no idea who did. Then, one fine day, as he walks through the hall, he sees Will solving yet another advanced question posted outside the classroom as an assignment.

Shocked by Will’s brilliance, Lambeau wants him to join his research project. But there's a hitch Will is in jail for a small fight he got into recently. To get him released, Lambeau has to convince the judge, who agrees under one condition: Will must attend mandatory therapy.

Will finds the whole thing hilarious. He visits several therapists, all of whom he embarrasses with his intellect, frustrating them because he never answers their questions sincerely or opens up.

Lambeau grows increasingly frustrated. Will hides behind his intellect and humor, never letting his true feelings show. Eventually, Lambeau realizes that the only person who might be able to reach Will is his old school friend, Sean Maguire. Although the two don't share the best relationship, Lambeau has no other choice.

Sean agrees to try helping Will, but even he is faced with the same challenge Will uses his intellect to dodge questions and tries to prove that Sean’s efforts are meaningless.

Will has an intellectual comeback for every question Sean poses. He even taunts Sean, trying to provoke him into quitting and Sean nearly does after the first session.

But Sean doesn’t cave like the others. He sees through Will. He knows Will is doing all this because deep down, there’s something he needs to let go of to truly be free.

After three sessions, Sean finally figures out a way to reach him and it’s through this one dialogue that a hidden part of Will is unlocked and is indicative of the reality of a large number of people in today’s world:

“You’re a tough kid. I ask you about war, and you’ll probably throw Shakespeare at me, right? ‘Once more into the breach, dear friends.’

But you’ve never been near one.

You’ve never held your best friend’s head in your lap and watched him gasp his last breath, looking to you for help.

And if I asked you about love, you’d probably quote me a sonnet.

But you’ve never looked at a woman and been totally vulnerable.

Known someone who could level you with her eyes.

Feeling like God put an angel on earth just for you, who could rescue you from the depths of hell.

I look at you; I don’t see an intelligent, confident man—I see a cocky, scared-shitless kid.

But you’re a genius, Will. No one denies that.

Personally, I don’t give a shit about all that. Because you know what? I can’t learn anything from you, I can’t read in some fuckin’ book.

Unless you wanna talk about you, who you are. And I’m fascinated. I’m in. But you don’t wanna do that, do you, sport? You’re terrified of what you might say.”

This is the problem with people around the world. We start intellectualizing problems and assume that’s the solution to everything and run away from our real problems.

Matt Damon plays one of the most brilliant minds in the world someone who can solve any scientific or mathematical problem. But when it comes to facing himself and opening up to others, that same brilliant mind fails to comprehend the task.

I felt the same way when I saw Cillian Murphy’s character in Oppenheimer, where he portrays Robert Oppenheimer a man who pioneered the atomic bomb. He can solve every single possible problem he has but struggled with significant relationship problems throughout his life, both personally and professionally.

It’s something we’re sadly never taught. But something we have to learn through experience.

Some of us like me, writing this essay are lucky. I was raised in an open-ended family, where unresolved issues are spoken about and get resolved. But many aren’t as lucky. They carry this unresolved personality into their everyday lives.

So what’s the relevance of all this?

We bring this unresolved personality to our work, to our families, to our friendships. And it blinds us from seeing people with empathy.

Once you resolve your own inner feelings, you become a better leader. Someone who inspires. You meet your colleagues and empathize better.

Some of the best seniors and leaders I’ve had the pleasure of working with bring a mix of brilliance and empathy, not just brilliance.

Don’t confuse vulnerability with weakness. Vulnerability is often masked to show a 'sense of strength.' But it actually takes immense strength to be vulnerable. That’s why most people hide it.

In my field of investment management, I deal not just with data, but also with the emotions of clients. So if I haven’t resolved my own issues, if I don’t understand who I am as a person, how can I truly empathize with a client and manage their emotions?

“If you can’t save yourself first, how are you saving society?”
— Naval

In fact, let’s move beyond the psychological and human aspects of resolving issues, and back it up with science.

Having that difficult conversation with yourself or with someone else releases expensive dopamine.

This dopamine is released at the cost of facing your unresolved issues. This dopamine is longer-lasting. It leaves you feeling deeply satisfied and relieved.

Think about it: when there’s an unresolved conversation with your partner, family, colleague, or friend, it eats you up inside. But once you finally have that talk, regardless of the outcome, you feel a sense of relief. It stops gnawing at you. It gives you closure.

We all go through this. It’s human.

But the faster we resolve these issues, the better we become both for ourselves and for those around us.

Conclusion

Gentle reader, you may be the most brilliant person, but if you’re someone who is hiding unresolved issues and not confronting them, all that brilliance will be irrelevant after a certain point for the people around you.

This contrast between academic intelligence of Lambeau and emotional intelligence Sean is a core theme in the movie that hit me really hard.

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