Leaning into Resistance
Facing the things we need to do in life and not running away from them. Not being afraid of being judged by others and following your heart.
Elon Musk said billionaire investor Charlie Munger once told people at a lunch "all the ways Tesla would fail."
"I was at a lunch with Munger in 2009 where he told the whole table all the ways Tesla would fail," he said.
"Made me quite sad, but I told him I agreed with all those reasons & that we would probably die, but it was worth trying anyway."
There is one underlying force of nature that prevents all of us from doing the things our inner child desires but deems irrational due to this force, it’s called Resistance.
What are your reasons for not writing that blog, making that painting, taking up that creative task, or doing anything outside of work that you consider important but not a good time to do?
Here are some common answers:
“I am too busy”
“I will do it later when the time is right”
“I am not in that space in my life”
“What will people think of me?”
These are sentences accentuated by the invisible force called Resistance.
Now, what exactly is resistance?
Resistance refers to any action that rejects immediate short-term gratification in favor of long-term growth, health, or integrity.
It is the force of nature that every individual encounters, which leads us to question whether what we are doing in the short term is truly worthwhile or not.
As Jedi Master Yoda rightly says- you must feel the force and embrace it and not give in to feelings of self-doubt as that it is the path to the dark side.
Today I am here to tell you through own my readings and reflections, that the path to beat resistance and self-doubt is more process-oriented than you think. Or maybe you already knew this and just needed a gentle reminder.
I was engrossed in a captivating book called "Do The Work" by Steven Pressfield, which I unexpectedly came across on the dining table as my father had ordered it. The reason I decided to delve into this book was quite straightforward. Although I wasn't necessarily seeking a self-help or motivational read, I hold the author in high regard, and the fact that the foreword was written by the marketing genius Seth Godin intrigued me. It was a mere coincidence, or was it?
I also did a post on writing inspired by these two names I mentioned.
The first chapter of the book encompasses the core essence, and this blog post focuses on the principles outlined in that chapter.
Embracing Resistance
Whenever we embark on the creation of anything - be it art, commerce, science, or love - or strive to evolve into a better version of ourselves, we unleash an equal and opposite reaction from the universe. Remember Newton’s law you studied in the 9th standard?
The following is a list of activities that tend to provoke Resistance within us:
Pursuing any creative calling in the arts, such as writing, painting, singing, acting, or any other form of creative expression, no matter how insignificant or futile it may seem
Initiating a project or venture without any visibility of prestige or monetary incentive
Following a diet or health regimen that makes us change our current regime
Engaging in activities for spiritual growth
Participating in courses or programs aimed at overcoming unhealthy habits or addictions.
Pursuing further educational courses once you have started working unless it is necessary for career advancement
Taking on a venture solely to assist others, without any financial incentive
Making a principled stand in the face of adversity for any noble cause
Committing acts that require heartfelt dedication, such as opening up to a loved one
I will highlight who our enemies are that are making us feel this way and who our friends are who will help us overcome feeling this way.
Our Enemies, The Problems
Resistance (Fear, Self-Doubt, Procrastination, Addiction, Distraction, Ego, Narcissism)
What will my friends, family, and strangers think of this new practice that I am getting into?
Am I good enough to actually venture out and do this project by myself?
I will do this project tomorrow.
I am too busy to do that project.
This project is beneath me; it holds no monetary value or status.
I am too important in this world. I can't have people forming certain opinions of me. Hence, I should skip doing that project, even though I feel it is something I would love to do.
Rational Thought:
This seems like the rational thing to do, but just because the 10 other people around me are not doing that thing, it probably means that I am wrong.
Friends and Family (Controversial but true, we will discuss later how they are our most cherished allies):
Anyone who has moved away from the crowd to pursue unconventional activities will face banter and criticism from friends. This is a byproduct and should not be taken as a negative. Humans are not accustomed to change, and it is not easy for them to perceive a changed person as anything other than what they already know. The same happens with family.
Our friends and family know us as we are and are invested in knowing us as we are, so it becomes difficult to accept change
Our Chatter Brain:
Our chattering brain can also be our enemy because if we even give it a nanosecond, it will start producing excuses, alibis, transparent self-justifications, and much more. Breathe and let the thoughts flow. Don't be weighed down by this chatter.
Our Friends, Our Solutions:
Stupidity:
Steven Pressfield provides examples of individuals who followed the path of stupidity: Charles Lindbergh, Steve Jobs, and Winston Churchill. Why? Because any smart person who knew how impossibly challenging the tasks they had set for themselves would have given up before even starting
Steve Jobs echoed this thought in his Stanford commencement speech. ‘Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish’
Stubbornness:
In the beginning, you may face criticism for pursuing something in your life despite receiving advice from those around you. Give it enough time, and you will realize that this stubbornness is what keeps you moving forward. However, be mindful not to intentionally hurt anyone's feelings with your stubbornness
Stubbornness is arguably more important than perseverance because a perseverant person can easily be discouraged by those closest to them, while a stubborn person will persist regardless
Blind Faith:
You must maintain some blind faith in what you're doing because the journey of starting something unconventional is generally a solitary one, understood best by yourself
Our most powerful ally is something intangible - something we cannot hear, touch, see, or feel
Passion:
Passion for something will drive us in the right direction and sustain our practice for decades to come. Any other process motivated solely by others' interests will not be sustainable
Friends and Family:
Given enough time, your friends and family will eventually come to accept the changed version of you
What we do and whom we do it for will remain with us forever.
Pressfield beautifully lays out the above points of our friends and enemies, to which I have also added my own perspective.
“A child has no trouble believing the unbelievable, nor does a genius or madman. It's only you and I, with our big brains and inflated egos, who doubt, overthink, and hesitate”- Steven Pressfield
On the field of the self, there stands a knight and a dragon. You are the knight, and resistance is the dragon.
However, there needs to be a process in place to fight off the dragon called resistance.
Examples of some processes that I follow for activities that spring up this force of resistance in my life:
Writing: The act of writing always comes with the force of resistance. Thoughts like "I don't feel like writing today" or "I have no inspiration" arise. I firmly believe that writing is more process-oriented than many people realize. You have to sit down regularly at a scheduled time, and I promise you the words will flow.
Strength Training: It is called resistance training for a reason; pushing beyond that resistance leads to real growth. Strength training also serves as a reminder that you will never feel like "showing up," but the real work is in just "showing up." The rest will follow.
Work: I apply the principles of strength training to my work. Not every day at work will be exciting or enjoyable, but you have to show up regardless. Many exciting outcomes at work result from seemingly mundane tasks, such as consistently reading about an investee company, following up with clients, or performing routine operational work. You have to overcome the resistance in your mind to tackle the tasks that have been causing you to worry.
If you're feeling anxious in life or concerned about something at work or in your personal life, it is likely that the force called resistance is behind these feelings. Lean into it; don't run away from it because that's probably the issue you need to address. I often remind myself to do the same.
I still experience this resistance in relation to work and many aspects of life, but as I learned and embraced this invisible force of nature more, I started feeling its grip on me less and less.
If you find yourself writing for others or living your life based on others' expectations or being emotionally dependent on their opinions, you will always be under the shadow of this force called resistance. However, once you begin cultivating independence in your thinking, this force called resistance slowly starts to fade away.
As I always end my blogs by connecting this concept with resistance and the stock markets:
In stock market terms, the value of a stock often encounters a critical point known as the line of resistance. When a stock crosses this line, it can lead to a breakout of resistance and a subsequent fall in the price of the stock. This concept is well understood by my friends who work in the stock market and are familiar with technical analysis.
We must ensure that the stock does not fall below that line, as it would result in a loss of value.
Support is a level where a downtrend is expected to pause due to increased demand.
Resistance, on the other hand, is a level where an uptrend in the stock is expected to pause due to increased supply which could lead to the breakdown in the stock.
Similarly, as time passes and we continually delay taking action in our lives, we reach a point analogous to resistance in the stock market. The longer we delay, the more challenging it becomes to accomplish those tasks, eventually leading to a reduction in the probability of pursuing them. I specifically highlighted the word probability because it is not impossible.
At times, it may feel as though we question the purpose of it all. However, it's important to remember that these doubts are merely the result of resistance exerting its invisible influence.
Instead of refusing the handshake, we should embrace and make peace with resistance. Everyone experiences these feelings and struggles, that’s what makes us who we are.